My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Soap is not a condiment
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.