Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I spit up blood this morning
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...