So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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