whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
