In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
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