Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
We're too hungover to prance.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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