The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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