She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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