SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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