C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
