My hair reeks of homosexuality.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
The air was thick with penises
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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