i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
