why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
