k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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