i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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