He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
