I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
