just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
