11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
