Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
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It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
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I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.