New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
