We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize