My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
my being single is dangerous.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
