You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
