I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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