That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
