Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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