I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
