I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize