super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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