Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
