physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
