Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

(1-978): View more from Massachusetts

Nah. I did too.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry

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(850): View more from Florida

she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."

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(216): View more from Ohio

Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."

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(541): View more from Oregon

blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.

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(631): View more from New York

One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.

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(305): View more from Florida

Are we allowed to ho on the roof?

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