It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
