I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Randomize
