So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
