Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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