My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
do herpes really smell.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
