We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
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