I want to stick my p in your. b.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
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