he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize