How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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