What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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