I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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