my vag is so smooth its legendary
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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