Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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