Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
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btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
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All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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