I cannot find my penis.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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