Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
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