I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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