another moral hangover. fuck.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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