Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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